Posts Tagged ‘toddler’

Four Reichen

Tuesday, November 16th, 2010

Happy Birthday to you my most extraordinary little boy

Four years ago today you brought me incredible joy.


I couldn’t wait to meet you when I realized I was pregnant

I counted down the days including every single second.


The day you were born you made me a mother

A gift so rare I will never receive it from another.


You’ve changed and you’ve grown so much these four years

You wiggle your eyebrows and try to do the same with your ears.


You now like to draw and we practice all your numbers

And you’re such a big boy you no longer need diapers.


You’re super well spoken and know all your colors

You love to play cars and even share them with others.


You can brush your own teeth and always ask me to read

And when you laugh really hard you gasp when you breathe.


You weigh a whopping 40 pounds and your favorite color is pink

And you giggle like crazy when you show me how you wink.


Everywhere we go, people say you look just like your daddy

And you think it’s really funny when you smack your own fanny.


I can’t believe, Reichen Micheal, that you’re four years old today

And your dad and I just want to wish you a very happy birthday.


We’re Not Really a TV Family. And By We, I Mean My Boys, Not Me.

Sunday, February 14th, 2010

We’re not really a TV family.  And by we, I mean my boys, not me.  I am totally a TV person.  In fact, my DVR and I are best friends.  I know this because not only have we exchanged BFF necklaces where she wears one half of the gold heart charm and I wear the other, we also spend all of our free time together watching Project Runway, The Housewives of Orange County, and The Bachelor.  It’s awesome.

What’s also awesome:  the power the one program I allow Reichen to watch every night before bed wields over him.  Have you seen The Wonder Pets on NickJr?  It chronicles the adventures of three singing classroom pets:  Linny the Guinea Pig, Ming-Ming Duckling and Turtle Tuck, who travel the world and use teamwork to save baby animals in distress.


I don’t know who makes this stuff up, but who ever it is, commands more control over my son than I do.  No matter how many times I tell Reichen his baby brother doesn’t really like being gagged, tackled, and whipped to the floor,  nothing stops my kid quicker than me threatening him with The Wonder Pets.

Me: “Don’t tackle your brother.  It’s not nice.”

Reichen:“I like to tackle Latham.  He likes it.”

Me:“If you tackle Latham again, you have to sit in time out.”

Reichen:“Okay, Momma.  I’m going to tackle Latham and sit in time out.”

Me:“If you tackle Latham, you have to give me your cars.”

Reichen: “Okay, Momma.”

Me:“If you tackle Latham, you can’t watch The Wonder Pets tonight.”

Reichen: “I can’t watch The Wonder Pets?  Okay, Momma.  I won’t tackle him.”

The  Wonder Pets threat works for everything:  eating veggies, taking a nap, not touching toys at Target.  Everything.  I’m even thinking about writing a book about it as a new technique to parent toddlers.  At play dates, it’ll be the talk of all the moms.

Mom #1: “My toddler is throwing tantrums every time I ask him to eat his peas.”

Mom #2: “Have you read that book about The Wonder Pets technique?”

Mom #1: “No, I haven’t.  Does it really work?”

Mom #2: “It really works.  You should read it.”

Yup, I think it would be a best seller. Maybe I’ll even get on Oprah.  I’m totally going to write it, but first I have to watch Project Runway with my BFF.   Until then, here’s Reichen singing The Wonder Pets theme song. He busted it out on us tonight.  We didn’t even know he knew it.

Chugga Chugga Poo Poo

Tuesday, January 26th, 2010



I hear it coming, it’s on the way

In fact, it’s here and it’s here to stay.


The potty train is at your front door

And I’m the conductor yelling, “All Aboard!”


You get mad and say it’s not for you

To that, I reply “Chugga Chugga Poo Poo!”


You think it’s funny and laugh a little bit

Until you’re on the stool and then you start to kick.


You’re filled full of  fluids and I know you have to go

But when I ask you if you’re ready, you say ‘No! No! No!!”


So we continue to sit and wait several minutes

We read, play games, and I try every gimmick.


I tell you there’s candy, it’s your favorite reward

You just have to potty and every piece can be yours.


We wait and we wait and get really bored

But suddenly you’re ready and both of us are floored.


You did it! I knew it! I’m so full of elation!

Reichen’s train has finally left the potty station.

Um, What is Hoof and Mouth Disease?

Thursday, September 10th, 2009

I have never heard of hoof and mouth disease until the doctor diagnosed my youngest son over the phone.  I frantically dialed our on-call pediatrician Monday morning after sores and blisters popped up all over his mouth, tongue and throat during the holiday weekend.  She said I didn’t need to take him to the emergency room as long as he was eating and drinking, but instructed I should bring him to the office first thing Tuesday morning so his regular doctor could confirm the diagnosis. 

After hoof and mouth left her lips, I pretty much didn’t hear another word.  She sounded like the teacher you hear but never see on those Charlie Brown cartoon specials.  Every time the bald little boy wearing that goofy yellow t-shirt with the zig zag brown stripe asked for help on his homework, the viewer never understood what she was saying.

Me:  “Um, What is hoof and mouth disease?”

Doctor:  “Waht, wah, wahh, wahh, waht.”

Me:  “I’m sorry.  What is it?”

Doctor:  “Waht, like the flu, wah, wahh, with blisters, waht, very contagious.”

Me:  “So, there’s nothing I can do to prevent my other son from getting it?”

Doctor:  “Waht, wah, wahh, wahh, waht,  no.”

Me:  “How long is it going to last?  It’s already been nearly a week.”

Doctor:  “Waht, usually, wahh, wahh, 10 days.”

After the initial shock wore off, I tried to conentrate on the conversation a little better.  The doctor went on to say hoof and mouth disease is extremely common and that all babies and toddlers get it.  She even said she was surprised neither Latham or Reichen had contracted the virus before now.

I made my husband take Latham Tuesday morning for the official diagnosis.  I couldn’t stand to hear the doctor say hoof and mouth disease again.  David said as soon as the doctor walked in the exam room, he said it:   hoof and mouth. 

As soon as I put the boys down for their afternoon nap, I hopped on the world wide web to research this nasty little disease further and here’s just some of the fun I found:


According to the Mayo Clinic’s website, Hoof and Mouth Disease, a.k.a. Hand, Foot, and Mouth, is a mild, contagious viral infection common in young children. Characterized by sores in the mouth and a rash on the hands and feet, hand-foot-and-mouth disease is most commonly caused by a coxsackievirus.

Here’s the part that gets me:  there’s no specific treatment for this disease.  I just have to watch my little boy suffer.  The website suggests you can reduce the risk of infection by practicing good hygiene, such as washing your hands often and thoroughly.

I am an admitted freak show hand washer.  In fact, I wash their hands so often and so thoroughly that I’m surprised they have hands left to wash.  If my boys can get this horrible virus, anyone can.

 It will be one week today that Latham has been battling hoof and mouth disease.  Reichen just started his fever yesterday, which means the sores will be showing up any day now.  If my time line is correct, we will  be dealing with this disease for about 3 weeks before the boys are better.

Fun times ahead.  Fun.

Diaper Duty

Thursday, July 16th, 2009

I dry heave all day every day.  I can’t help it.  It’s diaper duty that does it to me.

I’m actually dry heaving right now just thinking about the priceless little package waiting for me in the morning.  Let’s just say I gave both my boys blueberries for dinner.  Here’s a little piece of trivia for you:  blueberries turn a baby’s bowel movement black.  It’s not a pleasant sight or smell.

I’ve always had a weak stomach, just ask my mother-in-law.  I barely knew the woman before I puked all over her.  My husband decided she and I should get to know each other better so he suggested a girls’ day out.  I drove us two hours to the biggest and best mall in the state with my stomach churning with nerves the entire ride.  We no sooner stepped foot in the shopping center when I literally blew chunks.  I was just as surprised as she was when it happened.  When she thought round two was headed her way, she grabbed my head and pushed it into a potted plant – I spewed.  We walked toward the closest store when I spotted a drinking fountain –  I overflowed it.  She ended up driving me home while listening to me puke in my purse for two hours. 

Changing diaper after diaper, day after day is not much better for my belly.  I really forced myself to keep it down the other day after I found my 14 month old smearing his own excrement over everything he owned.  He was thrilled with the pliable poop.  I was mortified.  Let’s just say that I dry heaved a lot that day.

The final diaper duty of the day happens just before I go to bed – that’s when I wake my two year old toddler and change him one last time.  Since the summer heat has hit, he drinks lots of liquids – liquids his diaper just can’t hold an entire night.  This diaper duty is different.  I don’t mind it, in fact, I love it.  My little boy is so sleepy and snugly that it doesn’t matter what’s in his diaper.  When he realizes it’s me,  he holds me tight, rests his head on my shoulder and whispers he loves me.  It’s so special.  It’s so amazing.  It’s so worth every dry heave I’ll ever have.

JCrew – Take Two

Friday, July 10th, 2009

I have a love/hate relationship with JCrew.  I love the product.  I hate the employees – at least those who work at the store where I shop anyhow.

If you haven’t already, click here to catch all the JCrew blues I’ve experienced so far. 

My most recent ‘oh-no-she-didn’t’ moment happened as I was picking up a couple of tanks for my trip to Phoenix.  It’s hot there, you know.  Really, really, really hot.  JCrew has so many terrific tops that I knew I would find something in minutes – which is all I have when I’ve got two toddlers strapped to a double stroller.

I popped in the only JCrew store in a two state radius where I was not greeted, not asked if my multiple items could be placed in a fitting room, and not rung up – even after begging employee after employee.

When a smiling JCrew girl finally bounced to the register to ask if I was ready, I replied that I had been ready ever since I’d been standing there for the last five minutes.  Let me portray this JCrew picture for you perfectly:  NO ONE WAS IN THE STORE.  Not a single person other than me, my two toddlers and probably six employees. 

When the register ringer asked if I found every thing alright, I told her in a fairly irritated tone all that had happened – or in this case not happened – since I stepped foot in the store.

Her smile disappeared immediately and she said…   wait for it… wait for it…

She said, “You’re lucky to get those tops.”  THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID! 

I don’t have a clever ending to this sad story.  By the time she said it I was rung up and ready to go, so I simply picked my jaw up off the floor and left.

Toddler Talk

Thursday, July 9th, 2009

Me:  “Reichen, are you poopy?”

Reichen:  “No, I’m not poopy.  I’m happy!”

What my 2 1/2 year old toddler tells me when I ask him if he needs his diaper changed.

The See-Saw Strikes Again

Thursday, May 28th, 2009

Parenthood is such a surprise.  Every day, I’m surprised.  Really.

I’m surprised when my toddler hugs my neck and says, “I love you, Momma.”  I’m surprised when he sings ‘Happy Birthday to You’ all day every day to the grass, to the house, to me, and to neighbor’s dog.  I’m surprised when he tells me exactly what he wants for lunch.  I’m surprised when he says, “Thank you, Momma” when I give it to him. You get the idea. 

It’s surprising to me that my little helpless baby – the one I cared for all day every day when he couldn’t do anything for himself  – is blossoming into this fully functioning human being who has own ideas, thoughts and feelings.  It’s so cool.  But at the same time, it’s not so cool.

It’s the see-saw of parenting.  You know, that piece of equipment on the playground you used to love as a kid.  You would grab your best friend and go up and down and up and down every chance you got.  I loved it.  I’ve decided parenting is a lot like that old recess ride. 

I love that he can roll over- up I go.  I hate that he can roll over- down I go.  I love that he can crawl – up I go.  I hate that he can crawl – down I go.  I love that he can walk – up I go.  I hate that he can walk – down I go.  I’m getting dizzy just writing about it.  From what I understand, it doesn’t get any easier when your children get older.  I’m told that not only does it get worse, the ride speeds up. 

Kindergarten, extracurricular activities, high school, dating, driving, graduation, college:  the list goes on and on.  I know as a parent, you’re thrilled to see your children accomplish all these amazing life goals- up you go.  But where is the little baby who held your finger every night when you rocked him to sleep – down you go.  

It really put it all into perspective when my just turned one year old little baby did something surprising today too.  Reichen waved at Latham and Latham waved back.  I was so surprised!  My baby is waving – up I go.  My baby is waving – down I go.  I thought did that really just happen?  I gave him a couple of minutes and I said, “Wave, Latham.”  His chubby little arm popped in the air and he started waving.  It brought tears to my eyes.

‘Oh great,’ I thought.  The see-saw strikes again.

“I Miss you Already.”

Wednesday, May 27th, 2009

Do two year olds know how to work the mommy guilt, or what?  I stay at home with my two little boys, so I rarely go anywhere without them.  They’re about as hard to pull away from me as my teeth.  I mean, it can happen but not without a lot of wiggling back and forth, pulling with extreme force, and a lot of whining. 

But get this:  my two year old has added a new weapon to his arsenal.  After all the untangling of arms and legs, crying, sweating and begging, he cocks his head to the side, puts on a sad face and says, “Momma, I miss you already.”  He says it so calmly.  He says it like he hasn’t just left permanent marks on my neck for the last 20 minutes after clawing for me to stay.

I’m proud of him.  He’s really taking it to the next level, don’t you agree?  But I kind of do feel bad for him.  He’s found out the hard way that guilt doesn’t work either.  After applying a little salve to my war wounds, I leave the little dude in my dust!

Poop Floats

Wednesday, May 13th, 2009

Reason #212 my 2 1/2 year old son is not ready to potty train:

Reichen:  “I want to swim in the bath, Momma.”

Me:   “Okay, baby.  I’ll dry off your brother while you swim in the tub a little more.”

Reichen:   “Okay, Momma.”

Me:   “Reichen, what’s that smell?”

Reichen:   “Reichen poop, Momma.”

Me:   “What?!?!?”

Reichen:   “I poop in tub, Momma.”

Me:   “No way…”

Reichen:   “Momma, poop floating in bath!”

Me:   “I guess it does, buddy.”

The Crazy Bird is Back

Tuesday, April 28th, 2009

You have never and I mean never seen a toddler more petrified until you see a bird slam into the kitchen window literally inches away from his head.  We were having a yummy family breakfast of egg whites, wheat toast and yogurt with the baby in the high chair and my 2 1/2 year old in the booster seat next to the window.  It’s my toddler’s place of choice so he doesn’t miss a single thing of what the world has to offer on the other side of the six foot piece of glass.  Usually, we talk about the rain or the wind, the trees or the grass and lately we’ve even been talking about the birds who have been visiting the feeder.  But today was far from our normal morning routine or conversation. 

All three of us were the innocent bystanders of a crazy kamikaze bird.  I have never seen anything like it.  Okay, maybe I have.  Years ago, I was driving 70mph on the highway when another berserk bird bashed its beak into my windshield.  My husband would argue I hit it, but could not disagree more.  I stick to my story that the little guy wanted to end it all and did everything in its’ power to make it happen.  

 Now, let me clarify that my 2 1/2 year old loves to be scared.  In fact, he begs for it.  When daddy pops up from behind the couch and grabs him he just screams and then melts into the sweetest giggles you’ve ever heard.  Reichen thinks it is hilarious.  He did not think the incident this morning however was hilarious.

This crazy bird popped out of nowhere and slammed into the window.  Reichen gasped, his body shook, and his eyes bugged out of his little body.  He looked at me terrified and whispered, “Mamma, what was that?”  After I shook off my shock, I replied “It’s a bird, buddy.”  “He hit the window.”  Reichen was close to tears until he heard me cracking up after he asked, “Is it a crazy bird, momma?”  “Yes doodle bug,”  I barely got out of my mouth while laughing.  “It is a crazy bird.”  

I’m not exaggeratting at all when I tell you that same crazy bird slammed into every single window in our house all day, but I’ve got to give it to Reichen.  He wasn’t scared anymore when it happened.  He just grinned and simply stated “Momma, the crazy bird is back!”