Posts Tagged ‘husband’

Husbandism #49

Friday, March 30th, 2012

David:  “I’m not sure I like your new shampoo.  I mean, it smells like what we used to wash our dog with when I was a kid.”

What my husband said last night after smelling my freshly washed hair.

Husbandism #48

Wednesday, February 8th, 2012

David:  “Hey, look what I did to Latham while you were gone!”

What my husband said when I returned from a short bathroom break at Red Lobster.

Husbandism #47

Tuesday, January 31st, 2012

David:  “I’m dying a slow death watching this show.  I mean, I’m clearly losing days off the back end of my life while watching this – I’m sure of it.”

What my husband said after watching The Bachelor with me on Monday night.

Husbandism #46

Sunday, January 29th, 2012

David:  “I wish I could find pitty spray that smells like your arms.  I’m serious.  I think I would be happier if I smelled like that.”

What my husband said after I put on vanilla scented lotion from Bath and Body Works.

Husbandism #45

Monday, January 16th, 2012

David:  “Just so you know, no boy will ever say ‘no’ to that question.”

What my husband replied when I asked him if I could eat his pickle – his dill pickle that was served with his turkey sandwich from the deli.

If You Want My Opinion, Hair It Is

Sunday, January 15th, 2012

You learn a lot about people when you’re the only one not drunk at your husband’s holiday work party.

“I’m obsessed with hair removal,” one woman shouts at me across the four person table top that at least eight of us crammed ourselves around.

“Really,” I scream. “You’re obsessed with hair removal?”

The band was playing so loud, you had to yell for the person inches away from you to hear you.

“Me too,” pipes up another lady.

As usual, most of the girls migrated together to chat about the typical topics of babies, working out, and cute clothes, while our boys were bellied to the bar cracking inappropriate jokes, drinking beer, and talking about work.

“Yes, I’m obsessed with it,” the first woman carries on. “I want lasers to remove every hair on my body. Every. Hair.”

“Every. Hair,” I repeat like a parrot.

“Yes. Every. Hair,” she continues. “But until I can laser my arm hair, I’m just shaving it.”

“What do you mean, you’re shaving your arm hair? Your under arm hair,” I scream as the band seems to have taken it up a few decimals.

“No,” she giggles. “I mean my forearm hair.”

“What? You shave your forearm hair,” I say as I choke on a swig of diet coke.

“Yes,” she shouts. “I have for years, that’s why I want laser hair removal.”

“Look at my arms,” I say as I raise my sleeve. “I have hair on my forearms. That grosses you out?”

“Kind of,” she sheepishly smiles.

All the other ladies at the table quickly agree.

“Seriously,” I question. “Forearm hair is gross?”

“It is,” the answer from all the woman crashes over me like a wave.

I was shocked. I had no idea forearm hair was so repulsive. I mean, I’ve never even thought about it.

“So,” I continue to clarify, “You all think I should shave my forearm hair?”

“YES,” all the women reply a little too quickly for my liking.

Here’s the thing, I have never heard of this extreme aversion to forearm hair. And what’s more, I’ve never even noticed whether or not girls have it. I am stunned to learn the blond fur on my forearm is so repulsive and all these ladies either shave it or laser it.

“No woman should have forearm hair,” she says again while nodding no.

And with that, the topic changes to babies and which woman wants to have another one.

And that, my friends, is the stuff you learn at your husband’s holiday work party when everyone is drunk except you.

Just thought I’d share.

Husbandism #44

Thursday, January 5th, 2012

David: “Don’t worry, I know what will fix it:  A Subway napkin.  It’s works just like a band-aid.”

What my husband said to my 3 year old after he fell down and bit his tongue.

Husbandism #43

Monday, January 2nd, 2012

David: “Too bad I just clipped my toenails, otherwise I could grab it like a hook and pull it up with those.”

What my husband replied when I asked if he could grab me the magazine at the bottom of our bed.

Happy New Year!

Sunday, January 1st, 2012

Since I started writing 3 Stinky Boys and Me in the spring of 2009, I’ve never really thumbed through the archives of it.  But the other day, David was trying to remember something sweet our 5 year old used to say when he was about 2.  Neither of us could remember, exactly, what Reichen used to say.  And it made us sort of sad.  Later, after all my 3 stinky boys were in bed, I searched through the years of the blog and discovered it – the sweet thing my baby boy used to say!

I started this blog several years ago, for that very reason.  I wanted to capture our feelings, thoughts, and happenings of how we were at that exact time.  I don’t blog for the money, or the ads, or to become a super famous blogger – I do it because I want to remember everything.  Everything.  Especially the stuff the passing of time erases from my memory.

And for all of you who have followed My 3 Stinky Boys and Me’s adventures for the past several years, that’s icing on the cake.  Thank you so much for reading my little blog and supporting our family.  I have made some amazing friends, whom I know I’ll meet one day and I love hearing from all of you and following your adventures through your blogs.

Happy New Year!!!



Husbandism #42

Wednesday, December 14th, 2011

David:  “It’s so nice having her at work.  She’s like my third mom.”

Me:  “That is nice.  Wait… who’s your second mom?”

David:  “You are.”

The true conversation my husband and I had about his administrative assistant.  And no, I do not make this stuff up.  I. Swear.

Toddler Talk

Saturday, November 19th, 2011

Reichen:  “HI STINKY DADDY!!!  I like to call him stinky daddy because he stinks up the whole house.”

What my 5-year-old told his teacher when David picked him up from preschool.

Husbandism #41

Sunday, October 16th, 2011

David:  “Because I didn’t know I was going to roll up on Jenny from the Block (Jennifer Lopez) when I walked into the closet.”

What my husband said when I asked why he tried to stifle a giggle when he saw me in this hat.

fall hat

Toddler Talk

Wednesday, August 31st, 2011

Reichen:  “Mommy, I want you to go to the moon with me in my rocket ship and Daddy, you can go in Latham’s rocket ship.”

David:  “Why can’t I go with you in your rocket ship, Reichen?”

Reichen:  “Because, I like Mommy better.”

Toddler Talk

Monday, August 22nd, 2011

Reichen:  “Daddy, your eyes are blue and my eyes are blue.  Does that mean I’m going to be bald when I grow up?”

The conversation I overheard while David tucked in our 4 year old for the night.

Husbandism #40

Tuesday, August 16th, 2011

David:  “Angry Birds.  I like to play it when I’m crappin’.”

What my husband replied when I asked him why he was taking his phone into the bathroom.