“What is wrong with you,” I hear her scream as Reichen heaves open the door to the gym childcare room and Latham and I follow. “I told you,” she threatens, “if you do not stop acting like an idiot, you’ll be sorry.” Her teeth are clenched as each hateful word spews from her mouth. She grips her son’s arm and shakes it as she yells at him. And he is terrified. The 6 year old is crying so hard, he can’t even catch his breath. “Trust me,” she says as she shoves her son into the arms of a waiting childcare worker, “you do not want me to be the one who takes you out of here.” And with that, she leaves her sobbing son behind.
I realize I’m not breathing when all of a sudden I gulp for air. I can not believe what I just witnessed and think to myself, if that’s how that little boy’s mother talks to him in public, what happens to him in private? The thought made me sick.
And still does.
I drop to my knees immediately so I can look at my two toddlers in their blue eyes and remind them we never talk like that to anyone.
Ever.
Reichen looks at me and nods. Latham just looks.
I end up working out with that woman in a group fitness class. I’m on one side of the room and she’s on the other. There’s probably 30 people between her and me, and yet, I can’t see anyone else. As the instructor is telling us to run faster or jump higher, I can’t think about anything other than what just happened.
And I still can’t.
Today was obviously not the first time I’ve witnessed a parent berating a child. I was at the grocery store last week scouring the aisles for Rotel, when I heard a mom raising her voice with her child.
“You are a bad girl,” I couldn’t help but her her say, even though I was one aisle over. “You never keep your hands to yourself.” By now, I’ve maneuvered my cart around the corner and see who she’s scolding: a baby. “Why don’t you ever listen to me? You’re useless.”
Now, I don’t know exactly how old her baby was, but I do know that little girl could not have been more than 18 months. She was so young, she was actually propped on the front seat of the grocery cart still strapped in her carseat And already, her mother has deemed her useless. And I wonder, if that’s how that little girl’s mother talks to her in public, what happens to her in private? The thought made me sick.
And still does.
I don’t understand people talking like that to their children. And I don’t want to. Just the thought makes me sick.
And still does.
Related posts:
transferring their own self-hatred onto the undeserving.
they should just punch themselves in the mouth and call it a day.
Since becoming a mom, I’ve tried really hard not to judge the way other people choose to raise their kids. But things like this make me sick, too. It’s not a matter of cry-it-out vs. attachment parenting or breast vs. bottle. It’s something much more fundamental.
I remember once hearing someone say, “They didn’t ask to be born.” And, every time I feel really frustrated with my boys, I try to remind myself of that fact. Berating a child? Calling them useless? Just not acceptable in my book. No matter what you’re going through. They didn’t ask to be here. We’re the ones who brought them here.
Kristen @ Motherese´s last blog ..Random Acts of Courage
I have been feeling pretty guilty about losing a couple of times with my little monsters over the last couple of days and weirdly, this makes me feel better. Because I didn’t do that. Wouldn’t do that. Ever. I might not be awesome but they know I love them, that I think the best of them always, even when they ignore everything I say and flood the bathroom three times in the same day.
Angela´s last blog ..looking for zen in a bullseye
I just don’t understand some parents and why they would treat their “most precious treasures” this way. They need to have some parenting classes or anger management classes.
i’ve only heard parents do this a couple of times, and it’s infuriating. try not to internalize it or dwell on it. people at work think i’m nuts because i don’t read the news… i just can’t. it literally hurts my soul and i get depressed.
Wow that is harsh! I am with Kelsey, why do some people have kids?
I hope you only encounter nice mummy’s today x
Emily´s last blog ..Bluebell Photographs
i can’t handle this. why do some people even have kids you wonder.
i haven’t witnessed anything first hand yet, but i know it is coming nad i know i will feel the same way you do.
This truly sickens me. I have 3 boys of my own (9, almost 12 and 14). Each day I remind how myself how blessed I am the Lord has entrusted me with his children. If these mother’s only knew how precious their little ones are. Thank you for the reminder of how much we need to show our love to our children and instill in them self worth. Often makes you wonder how the parents childhood were!